Even though synchronized frying competitions were huge in North Dakota, the sport never really caught on with the rest of the world.

If your son suffers from the heartbreak and shame of TOHSIIE (Teen Onset Ham Sandwich Induced Involuntary Erection), now there’s hope with Flaccyte OTC.™

Rule of Children’s Marketing (RCM) #2,314.b: The inherent lameness of a new toy is inversely proportional to the level of spurious glee portrayed on screen.

Miss Petra, an accomplished and versatile stage performer, discovers a bit too late that Duke is not a ventriloquist’s dummy, but rather, a real dog with computer-generated antennae.

Parents and their children no longer have to stumble through awkward and vague conversations involving birds and bees. Instead, thanks to today’s advances in technology and communications, they can just watch online hentai videos together.

Quiz time – This is a commercial for:
a) L, a L.A.M.B. Fragrance by Gwen Stefani
b) Beano

After a string of successful homicides, Karen Goldberg-Hendrickson-Smythe-Suzuki-
Hudson-O’Mally realizes that she accidently drank from the goblet of wine she laced with iocane powder.

Today’s dispute with a television commercial: Barring starvation or mental illness, nobody gets this happy over potato chips.